Miss Octobass

Since all the medias say that we’re now DOOOOOOOOOMED due to a GIANT cyber-attack I suppose I have to break it to you:

No, this is not about a petty war between Spamhaus and Cyberbunker… All of us who actually KNOW stuff, we know, that it was…. Moss & Roy.

The Internet Breaks

Or maybe someone just typed “Google” into Google… NEVER do that!

You Can. Break. The Internet!

OK, I should have said this a long, looooooong time ago. Let me do it with a quote:

Wipe that goofy grin off your face and focus on the words I am about to tell you.  I want you to drop everything you are doing and execute the following immediately.  Failure in compliance will result in a wack in the head with a Dr. Marten boot.  Trust me, it’s for your own good.
- Run to your closet
- Even if you’re not at home, you’ll just have to run back.
- Gather all coats, jackets, skirts or tops that sport a slit, vent or pleat
- Some common places to look include the tail of a coat and the side of a skirt.
- Identify any threads in the form of an X holding the slit together
- If you find said dreadful X on a garment you have worn out in public, proceed to hang your head in shame
- Snip the thread off with a pair of scissors at once
- Use your teeth if you have to.  Seriously.
- Remove any remnants of this mark of stupidity
- Vow to cut every X out of your life
Hey, I sound like a relationship advice columist!

The loose X stitch is only meant to keep the slit or vent flat so it doesn’t get wrinkled during shipping or display.  Once the garment reaches your home, the X will have served its purpose in life and should go on to die a glorious death.
You might think I am causing a big fuss, but this seemingly innocent X can do a lot of harm.  A well-suited man wearing Ferragamo shoes and a Rolex can look like a fool in a second the moment he turns around and reveals the tack stitch he didn’t remove.  A classy lady sporting a beautifully-fitted pencil skirt would not be able to walk gracefully if the stitch were still holding the slit together.  No matter how polished the rest of you looks, the X will undo it all.  Danger danger! Threads are threats!

If you are X free, extend your arms so I can give you a virtual hug.  Friends don’t let friends leave their threads uncut and you are certainly a friend of Tiny Tines!

Source: Tiny Tines

Seriously, I see A LOT of people who haven’t actually understood, that this little X isn’t a part of their garment. And it looks daft, since it completely destroys the shape and fit of said garment.

Please, just trust me: get rid of your X’es.

Love
/The Fashion Fascist